no, he came in my armpit
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
