Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
