It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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