ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
