So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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