Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
