Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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