yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
