At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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