I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
