she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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