Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
