like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
