You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
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