Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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