so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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