Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
