I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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