i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
