dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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