i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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