I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
