And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
