when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
