guys are not supposed to queef...right?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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