herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
