jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
