i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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