just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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