I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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