protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
