So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
