Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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