I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
