Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
