at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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