we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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