forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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