i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
