dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
