Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
