I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Randomize