playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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