just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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