There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
