he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
The uberlube is also flammable
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
