i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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