You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I AM VODKA MAN
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
