so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize