question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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